I’ve realized lately that I need to invest more in me, not just in VTSAX. Mr. SSC points this out to me all the time. Often I get weighed down by focusing too much on savings… I’m guessing this happens to most of us with FIRE goals. But, lately I’ve found myself focusing so much on saving a few dollars here and there, that my general well-being is taking a hit.
Mr. SSC pointed out the other night, that I can occasionally go a little extreme. For instance, I have eczema, and for the last year I’ve had it bad on two fingers. I went to a dermatologist last spring, but they didn’t tell me anything that I didn’t know (my whole family has this issue, and I’ve had it my whole life, so I’m not a newbie in battling my skin). I got frustrated when they told me to come back in a month. I thought about it, but then it’s another $25 co-pay, and probably another prescription that may not work for $75 or so… so I never went back, and have just been dealing with my condition by myself. And Mr. SSC thinks I’m crazy that I don’t want to spend $100 or so for a chance at a fix. Thinking about it, it probably puts me in the ‘cheap’ vs. ‘frugal’ category. It doesn’t help that I have a general distrust and dislike of doctors. (I mean, this year I had a broken foot for 6 months that was misdiagnosed and I almost had bunion surgery before deciding to get a second opinion and finding out that my foot was broken).
I am typically a very fit individual, big into health and all that. But, having two babies has put me in a non-ideal form. I’m stronger than ever, but looking in the mirror that isn’t obvious because I got a nice layer of insulation covering it all up, if you know what I mean. I love eating healthy, absolutely love fruits and nuts and stir-fry and salads. All that stuff that could help remedy my post-baby-belly problem. But, I love saving money… and I often make decisions that favor my wallet, instead of my stomach. Probably not the best idea. But I feel guilty spending extra money on say, berries or other fresh ingredients. I know that I’ve got to lighten up – spend that few extra cents or dollars and make an investment in my health, but it’s so difficult for me to do.
I’ve posted before about how I am thinking about cutting back to part time hours. It won’t greatly affect our FIRE date, and it will make life easier and more pleasant for both Mr. SSC and I and the kids. But, I just can’t get over giving up 25% of my paycheck. Making money is so ingrained in my psyche that it’s hard to give it up, it just feels so selfish to decide not to work Fridays anymore. Every time I think about part-time work, I feel that deciding to work less goes against everything I grew up believing in. I think I need to come to terms with this soon, or I may not be able to FIRE when the time comes!
I’ve got no problem making only the best decisions for Mr. SSC and my kids… but when it comes to me, I will short-change my well-being to save a dollar. I have no idea why – perhaps I know that I’m able to (mostly) handle it. Do you all find yourselves making decisions that negatively impact aspects of your life just so that you can save a few dollars?